Experienta .... si munca  cu mii de oameni si psihologii diferite. E mai greu de explicat dar nu insist sa am dreptate.

Am zis ca nu mai scriu la subiectul asta, dar nu ma pot abtine.

Asta a fost un alt mesaj de la care am luat 'foc'.

Deci cineva care are experienta nu are voie sa incalce regulile de baza.

Nu am sarit la gitul parintiilor care au dat sfaturi din experienta lor de parinte,ci la cel a caror se considera specialisti (scuzMarius).

Astea sint procedurile elementare care noi le aplicam in cazul in care banuim ceva:

"Responding to suspicion or disclosure of child abuse

Child abuse, in any form, by anyone, is unacceptable. It is not unusual for a child to deny that something is wrong because it is a natural way of coping with something that can be overwhelming.

If you suspect a child has been, or is being, abused:

�    remain alert to any warning signs or indicators that a child is experiencing or is at risk of abuse

�    observe the child and make written notes as soon as you begin to have concerns � pay attention to changes in their behaviour, ideas, feelings and the words they use

�    have gentle, non-judgemental discussions with the child � expressing your concern that a child looks sad or unwell can result in disclosures

�    do not pressure a child to respond and do not ask questions that put words into a child�s mouth

�    assure the child that they can come and talk to you when they need to, and listen to them when they do

�    remember that child abuse does not go away and usually becomes more serious over time

�    seek expert advice by contacting the department

�    remember that not acting on a suspicion or disclosure may result in further harm to the child.

If a child tells you they are being abused:

�    remain calm

�    do not express shock, panic or disbelief � the child is counting on you to provide calm reassurance that they are being listened to and heard

�    find a private place to talk

�    thank the child for coming to talk to you about it and recognise their bravery for talking about something that may be difficult or embarrassing

�    be supportive, tell them that you believe what they are saying and thank them for helping you to understand

�    be a listener not an investigator � encourage children to talk in their own words and ask just enough questions to act protectively, for example, �can you tell me more about that?�

�    do not conduct any form of interview with the child

�    stress that what has happened is not their fault, for example, �you are not in trouble� and �if I look or sound upset it is because I want you to feel safe�

�    be aware of your tone of voice and help the child make sense of what you are feeling, for example, �I am feeling concerned for you,� or �what we can do right now is talk about ways to help you feel safe�

�    act proactively, for example, �I know some people do wrong things and it is up to grown-ups to protect children ,� or �every child has a right to be safe, there are laws to help protect children�

�    reassure the child that they have done the right thing by telling you, and that they are not in trouble

�    do not make promises you cannot keep, such as promising you will not tell anyone � you need to tell someone in order to get help for the child

�    as a concerned community member you can contact the Department of Communities, Child Safety and Disability Services and ask how best to respond to the situation

�    do not contact the person responsible for the abuse, regardless of who that person is � leave this to the department or the police

�    keep information confidential � only those who absolutely need to know should be told at this point.

If a parent tells you that a child has been abused, but the person responsible no longer has contact with the child, you should still contact the Department of Communities, Child Safety and Disability Services to help protect other children. You could also provide information to the parent about where they can get help and advice."